The Ballad of Robert Moore and Betty Coltrane
Nick Cave And The Bad Seeds
Songs for a November Night (2002)

There was a thick-set man with frog-eyes was standing at the
door
And a little bald man with wing-nut ears was waiting in the
car
Well, Robert Moore passed the frog-eyed man as he walked into the
bar
And Betty Coltrane, she jumped under her table...

"What's your pleasure?" asked the barman, he had a
face like boiled meat;
"There's a girl called Betty Coltrane that I have come to
see."
But I ain't seen that girl round here for more than a
week"
And Betty Coltrane she hid beneath the table...

Well, then in came a sailor with mermaids tattooed on his
arms,
Followed by the man with the wing-nut ears, who was waiting in the
car;
Well, Robert Moore sensed trouble, he'd seen it coming from
afar
And Betty Coltrane she gasped beneath the table...

Well, the sailor said, "I'm looking for my wife! They call
her Betty Coltrane."
And the frog-eyed man said, "That can't be! That's my
wife's maiden name!"
And the man with the wing-nut ears said, "Hey, I married her
back in Spain!"
And Betty Coltrane crossed herself beneath the table...

Well, Robert Moore stepped up and said, "That woman is my
wife."
And he drew a silver pistol and a wicked Bowie knife
And he shot the man with the wing-nut ears straight between the
eyes
And Betty Coltrane she moaned under the table...

Well, the frog-eyed man jumped at Robert Moore who stabbed him in
the chest;
As Mr. Frog-eyes died, he said, "Betty, you're the girl
that I loved best"
Then the sailor pulled a razor and Robert Moore blasted him to
bits
And, "Betty, I know you're under the table!"

"Well, have no fear" said Robert Moore "I do not
want to hurt you!
Never a woman did I love near half as much as you;
You are the blessed sun to me, girl, and you are the sacred
moon."
And Betty shot his legs out from under the table...

Well, Robert Moore went down heavy with a crash upon the
floor
And over to his trashing body Betty Coltrane she did crawl;
She put the gun to the back of his head and pulled the trigger once
more
And blew his brains out all over the table...

Well, Betty stood up and shook her head and waved the smoke
away;
Said, "I'm sorry, Mr. Barman, to leave your place this
way."
As she emptied out their wallets, she said, "I'll collect
my severance pay..."
Then she winked and threw a dollar on the table.